From Silence to Strength: A Survivor’s Journey John-Michael part 1 S3E8

Welcome to "Invading the Darkness: Stories from the Fight Against Child Sex Trafficking." Get your free copy of "Chosen," https://go.sharedhope.org/GiftChosen, a Shared Hope International film focusing on youth sex trafficking prevention. This valuable resource offers real-life stories and practical tools to raise awareness and encourage action against the trafficking of younger victims, like John-Michael.

Join our hosts, lived-experience experts Yvonne and Kim, as they discuss the stories of other survivors in the movement and share valuable insights to help you join the fight against sex trafficking. In this episode of Invading the Darkness, we hear from John-Michael in part 1 of his incredible story.

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As a young Olympic-bound athlete, John-Michael was groomed and sexually abused by prominent sports figures, highlighting the issue of demand and the need for awareness and prevention.

The adults in John-Michael's life didn't have the education and awareness to see the signs of trafficking and intervene – let's change that for other boys and girls just like him. Download your FREE copy of CHOSEN to learn how to protect the young people in your life from exploitation. https://go.sharedhope.org/GiftChosen

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Transcript

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Thank you for tuning in to Share your Hope in the Dark. Sex trafficking podcast. want to acknowledge that the content we discuss can be emotionally challenging and may evoke strong reactions. The stories we share suffer which may be difficult for some listeners to hear. Listener discretion is advised. Welcome back to season three of invading the darkness podcast where we amplify survivor voices and fight for justice. I'm Yvonne. I Kim, and we are survivors of sex trafficking using our voices to break the silence and spark the change. Today, we will hear from John Michael, a young Olympic-bound athlete. John Michael was chosen, manipulated, and trafficked by an influential group of wealthy elites who promised him and his family they can make his dreams come true. After he shares his powerful testimony, we'll dive into key takeaways and most importantly share practical ways that you can help bring systematic change. Let's get into it. I'm John Michael Lander and I'm from Ohio. And as a 14-year-old Olympic-bound athlete, the adults that were interested in my training sexually abused me and trafficked me and caused four years of my life to be silenced and full of guilt and shame. And these were people who were very well-prevalent men at Columbus, Ohio, and they were all like six figures. So they had this little secret society. and they would pick up on young men. I took eight at the Junior Olympics when I was 14, and they ran an article in the newspaper, in this law, you read it, contacted my mother and asked if they could meet, and they did. And so he began his grooming process with her, telling her that this group of professionals could help me reach my goal of becoming an Olympian and go to the Olympics and get a college scholarship. Everything would be taken care of. And all my mother would have to do was make sure that I was at the right place at the right time, dressed and ready to go. In return, these professional people would take care of anything that the family needed. So if they had medical appointments, medicine, operations, anything, they would take care of it. Now, the only thing is his stipulation with my mother after these couple of months of grooming her was that if I did not fulfill what the professionals wanted, then it's all over with. And that my parents would have to pay everything back to these professional people. And if they couldn't do that, then they would take the children away from my parents and sue my parents. And so she was like, my god, this is crazy. But she signed a contract with this lawyer. And it wasn't until then, after that was done, did he ever meet with me. And then he would take me out to dinner and talk to me. And he would tell me how incredible this opportunity. It was always presented as an opportunity, was a gift given to me from God. And that God has given this opportunity to me that I could help myself, but also help my family. So if I was interested, these professionals will take care of everything, practices, training, trips, swimsuits, everything, coaching fees, everything would be taken care of. And all I had to do was three things. Show up on time. do good in school and do good in competitions and never tell anyone. Those were my three things. And he says, anyway, you're also going to be helping your family. Now, here's the thing. My family didn't need the help, which is crazy because my dad was an architect. And so we weren't poor, but we weren't wealthy. We were middle class. But they had picked me out of this group of all of us that were on my team. And what we learned later is that they had already groomed our team or board and got themselves in there as being sponsors. And they said, we just want to focus on one of your divers. We'll take care of everything. We'll give the team some money as well. And that's how they positioned themselves with our team. And then they focused on me and I said, OK. And he said, you're the only one we're interested in. Nobody else is interesting. We don't want them. So don't say anything to anybody. This is your opportunity. And I said, OK. So I signed a contract because I thought I was helping my family. He told me that my sister who had a sledding accident had to have a reconstructive surgery that was going to be taken care of, no cost to my parents. And that's how this all began. And so for the next four years, that's what I did. I was being represented. I was being sponsored. This was an incredible opportunity. I represented our country in Norway, Denmark, Sweden, Canada, Mexico, won gold medals in many places. at the same time harboring the secret that I had to have sex with these professionals. That was the payback. And I remember at one point they would start taking us to parties, huge mansions in Columbus, Ohio, with very wealthy people and people very well known, and they would line us up. And there would be usually six of us. And I was always the youngest because I was in high school, but they were usually young college men. and they would give us certain costumes to wear. And so I was always put into a white Speedo, I guess because I was the diver. And so, and then they, and as we were in line, the guests would walk in and they would look us over, touch us, talk to us, ask us questions. Then they would go into a back room and they would silently bid on who they wanted. Whoever had the highest bid for that boy would get him for that day, that evening, for the week, or even for the weekend, whatever they wanted. And the boy who raised the most money had their tuition paid for or their books paid for or anything that they needed. It was all taken care of. And so that is how we started. We would get taken all over the world. But whenever we would go someplace like the Rose Bowl was a big deal because Ohio State would always go to the Rose Bowl. And since this was in Columbus, Ohio State was a big football team and we always had to go to the games. And so we'd go to the Rose Bowl and when we'd get there, we would be turned and auctioned off to other people. And whoever raised the most money then got to go first class on the way home and get cash. But they kept telling me this was my opportunity. This was what was going to save me. And what I didn't know as well is that they had already replaced our diving coach with one of their people who was in on it as well. And he started paying only attention to me. And so he pulled me away from my team and isolated. The whole thing was right there for us. And the whole point is, I say this is because we were in such a confined, well-constructed, well-oiled wheel, basically. Nobody could get to us. You know, one, we're a sport. Society isn't there. Within the sport is its own unique universe with their own jargon and their own way of talking and the normalization of what goes on in practices. You know, the touching. were constantly in speedos and swimsuits, were basically naked around each other. So everything became normalized. And that's what they betted on and they wanted that to happen. And so the coach would start touching you and moving you and positioning you in front of a whole crowd of people at a meet. There was no problem that they came up and touched you, you're behind, or in front of you, I gotta get you in the right position. So it all was normalized. But again, it was all about that opportunity. And I think that's one of the things that people don't want to listen to. And we hear this, and this is happening to boys all over the country at every level of sports. Because in the sports world, it's so small that if someone starts to feel the heat, they can go to another team. And a lot of times in high schools, the school will hire the coach two days or three days before practice starts. There's no time to do a background check. person looks great on paper, boom, we got it. And what happens is I don't think parents take enough time to find out who these people are as well and go in and speak with them. So the four years was all that about dealing with that and being passed around and shipped around. I remember when I was on my 16th birthday, I didn't want to go. The car came up and we lived on a farm. The car came up the long driveway and I said, I'm not going. And I thought that this was going to stop everything. And I remember my dad was in the kitchen smoking his cigarette and I just wanted him to stop it. I wanted him to say he doesn't have to go, but of course he didn't. And so my mom was saying, you gotta get going on. And I said, no. She said, why? And I finally said, he touches me. And I thought, this is it. I've done it. I got brave enough to say, mom, I don't wanna go. He touches me. And she says, well, where? And I couldn't say the words, so I grabbed the front of my pants and I said, here. And she looked at me, and for the first time, I felt relief because I thought I saw it in her eyes that she heard me. And then her mouth got really thin, and she turned around and slapped me and said, it's not nice to make up lies about people. These are prominent people in the community, and they're helping our family. You do your job and go out there. He's waiting for you. So I went. And there's times I wish I could have fought back, but that was my mom. And I still had that respect for my parents and any adult at that time. And so I didn't fight her. I went because I thought it was my job to help the family. That's how I was told. And so I thought if my mother didn't believe me, who else would? So I never told anyone. But I created indicators. And I really worked on this. And I found myself at school, I thought if I could get one teacher to come and ask me what was wrong, that it was my position, I guess you would say, or my, I had to answer her honestly, or him honestly, because I had to respect my parents and my adults. So I said, okay, I'm gonna do this. So one whole week, I was one of those kids who had to be impeccably dressed, and if I got any dirt on me, I had to change. I just couldn't have dirt. I wore the same outfit for the whole week. Not one teacher asked me anything. And the other thing was I was one of those kids who took like three or four showers a day. just, I couldn't stand the smell of chlorine. And so the next week I would wear another outfit the same week, whole week and not shower. No one asked me anything. And then finally I said, okay, this is it. And I'm one of those kids that if I cuss everybody laughs because it doesn't fit. And so I started dropping the F-bomb anywhere I could in the classroom, in the hallway, anywhere. And no one asked me anything. And later on, of course, we found out that the teachers thought, well, he's just stressed out. He's representing the United States all over the world. We'll just let him go. We'll just let him have a buy on this. But no one asked, and I begged for that. And so then I started thinking, what else can I do? So I started figuring out ways to regain my power or my control when I was on these dates. If you want to call them dates or whatever you want to call them, events. But realize that if I would turn the table and they pick me up and in the car, if I came on to the man driving and say how beautiful he was or how you're really attractive and I could just see us together forever and everything will be wonderful, I can't wait, things changed. Because this man who was married had a child my age. And then one or two things would happen. I would either find myself on the corner. and having to find my way home, which was what I was hoping for all the time, of course. Or it became very violent. And it would end up in the car, and it was just crazy. But I also found out that if I allowed myself not to climax, then I had the control in the upper hand. And if I could get them to do it quicker, it's over with. Because they don't want to be with you after they're done. These wealthy men who had wives and children at home, they just wanted to get their... whatever, and they were done with you. And so that was the other game that I used to come up and play. I'd come up with these ideas to turn the table, and that was my survival method. Wow, John Michael's story was so powerful. You know, the one thing about his testimony is it really does start to show the demand side of this ferocious crime. John Michael came from a middle-class family. He didn't have financial needs. He was specifically targeted by his traffickers. His victimization was not a result of his vulnerabilities. In fact, he was chosen. Yvonne, can you? kind of lead us into conversation about that a little bit. Yeah, so he was chosen. That pretty much says it right there, but not everybody would really understand that. We're talking about middle-class home, suburban areas, or even higher-class communities. And so people think that those children can't be harmed or touched. And we often hear, well, that wouldn't happen to my child. Well, it does. It can happen to any child. And so we want to highlight the fact that demand is the issue. It's not about boys. It's not about girls is demand, you know, or it's not just about boys. It's not just about girls. It's about demand. And so it's something that we need to always have in our conversation that it's not about the vulnerabilities. It's not about if you grew up in a trailer park or if you grew up, you know, in low income communities, but it's also the higher end areas as well. And honestly, you know, I've met survivors that from great families and I personally know John Michael. Great family, both parents and there was just something not in John Michael's case because they chose him for all the traveling and everything, all the different meets and greets that you know John Michael would have to be a part of. His traffickers was very specific in the audience that they were selling him to which just makes me sick to be honest. know, and so yeah, that demand. his traffickers, they were wealthy, they were well known, they were influential, you know, they were people in the community that were really held a pretty big status quo, you know, and so John Michael was groomed, his school was groomed, his parents were groomed. And John Michael even speaks in his video clip about how he didn't notice any of the parents getting to know the new coach. The new coach passed a, you know, looks really good on paper, passed a background check and boom, here he is just thrown into, you know, being the, it's kind of like a part-time caregiver for the kids. but none of the parents chose to get to know him? Do you know that statistically, nine times out of 10 anyways, a lot of statutory rapes and molestations that happen are from close family members that weaseled their way in to be in relationship with the family and then they're messing up the kid. But you bring money to the table and now they're calling it prostitution, which is something we're absolutely against because there's no such thing as a child prostitute. Yeah. And it's real sad because a lot of times we will use cries for help, you know, we'll act out, we'll have behavior changes. And that's something that John Michael talks about in his testimony when he shares, you know, he changed his behaviors. He even, you know, wore the same clothes for a week at a time, you know, so that way somebody would notice that he was actually trying to reach out for help without using his words, you know, and just the fact that he was completely overlooked. And you know, that cry wasn't answered. It's just, it's so disheartening and realistically, it's still going on in today's society where we are completely overlooking victims and we don't see the cry for help. And that's where we really have to shift. Or maybe some do see the cry for help and they don't know how to help. We do come from a generation that everybody feels offended, or that's none of my business. If you see something say something, even if saying something ends up being wrong, at least somebody showed up for that kid because it's not wrong. There's a lot of cases out there that never even get seen or. brought up to anybody's attention because, that's none of my business or, that kid's acting out or, that kid just has poor hygiene. You know, there's something going on at home and that's none of our business. Instead of actually reaching out and saying, Hey, what's going on? Ask the kid what's going on. John Michael was begging for somebody to ask him so that he could tell the truth and nobody did. So that's just crazy. Yeah, absolutely. And that was something that I could relate with him on. Now, I mean, for him, it was various years later in his college years where a dance teacher took notice. And then that's when things shifted for him. When they opened up the conversation with him, he was able to be vulnerable and start to share with the teacher. And for me, That's where it shifted in elementary school when a teacher also took notice as well and that's where the first CPI case was opened. It's like you said, you know, if you see something, say something, we have to be able to stand in the gap for those that don't know how to use their voice just yet. Yeah, well that brings me on to I'm wondering if that teacher had received any kind of training or maybe it's just something that she was just gifted at noticing and has this relational, you know, piece of her life that's like, you know, that extrovert, everybody's my friend type thing, you know. But one thing at Shared Hope International, this is something I absolutely love about, is Shared Hope International offers trainings. We also have what we call ambassadors of hope. So if somebody wanted to go to sharedhope.org and look up ambassadors, there's a little search engine somewhere, but the ambassadors, you can sign up to be an ambassador. If you're somebody that likes Reformation, you're somebody that likes change, or maybe you're just a natural gifted teacher and you just like to teach things, you can absolutely do that. You can go into your schools, you can go talk to your youth group, your church. There's just a lot of different avenues of being an ambassador of hope. We train you to go out and train others. Like it's an amazing thing. Or you can request a speaker. so if you know that, you know, there's a handful of kids in your school that is a cry for help and you have no idea where to begin or even where to start, but you know that maybe a training would help yourself or the other teachers or the, we even, there's even trainers for nurses. There's trainers for first time responders. I used to train first time responders on how to identify trafficked youth, how to respond to them. And first time responders are foster parents, CPS workers, nurses, EMTs, police officers, FBI. Those are the first time responders. And Kim, you also do work in the field with first time responders. Is that right? Yeah, that's correct, Yvonne. So you're right there on the front lines, boots hit the ground, get to talk with the victims and help them open up with conversation. Yeah, and it really does. I mean, it's a night and day difference. know, the conversations and investigations, the way that they used to go without me being involved or a victim's advocate being involved, that does have, you know, the lived experience, the trauma-informed training to be able to come in and kind of be that, you know, almost like that, that pillar in between me and law enforcement, you know, to kind of build that rapport and that trust with the victim. And so, They are able to feel more comfortable by opening up when you, you know, set the tone and you set the inviting space for them to be themselves and know that someone is there with them that kind of understands and that has walked that life. But it's really all about the training, right? So yeah, lived experience is great. Like we're talking about, but at the end of the day, if you have trauma informed training, which I have many colleagues in the field that are not survivors, but they have trauma-informed training. And when you are victim-centered, working alongside a victim, it makes all the difference because it back to it, makes or breaks that case. And so all you have to do is just be comfortable, be respectful, and have the appropriate training, and it will be successful. Listening is key too. Just listen. Yeah Well, John Michael's story reminds us that trafficking can happen to any child to help raise awareness We are offering you a free download of chosen which is shared hopes powerful short film It tells the stories of both Brianna and Lacey to trafficking survivors with stories similar to John Michael Watch and share chosen to learn more and to help the kids in your community safe Yes, just listen. Tune in next week to hear part two of John Michael's story. Thank you for listening, for standing with survivors, and for being the voice of justice. Until next time, stay informed, stay engaged, and keep fighting for change.